Living with illness.

I feel like a special needs child, unable to be left alone and constantly needing care and attention.  I'm not trying to say anything negative against children with special needs. They legitimately need care and attention, but also have a lot to offer the world if we stop and notice them.  I guess that accurately defines how I feel.  I legitimately need attention and have a hard time being by myself (usually), but I have a lot to offer if the world would stop and notice and look beyond the wounds and the surface.  There are a lot of differences between me and a special needs child and it probably isn't right to even compare myself to one, but one difference is that frequently their needs are noticeable.  On the flip side, my panic attacks and depression and PTSD are not noticeable at first glance or if you don't know me.  It's not something you talk about or share, but the symptoms and needs are no less life altering and life-interrupting than someone with a physical illness.  Living at home has been a blessing, but it has also been extremely difficult at times, both for me and my parents.  They want to help me, but don't know how.  I don't want to want their help, but I know I need it and I know they support me.  Our society has taught us that asking for help is a bad thing, that we always need to be independent.  But as I've walked a difficult journey, the one thing that keeps me going is a supportive community of people around me, whether it's my parents, my friends, pastors, mentors, etc.  We can't do this on our own.  We all need help and support and need to come to a place where we fall at the foot of the cross and say we can't do this on our own.  I've learned a lot in the past month about how much God loves me, is with me, and is waiting for me.  Living with a seemingly invisible illness is challenging in more ways than one, but I want to continue to work on finding my way back to Him and know this suffering was for a reason.